Better Outcomes for Depression and those other D*** “D” feelings
The Problem:
We want things and need things, so our future-thinking mind plans and imagines those things: what they will look like, how we’ll get them, and when. That is how EXPECTATIONS come to be, and they feel so real. All is fine until the plan – and ultimately the want – goes unfulfilled. Then come those damned “D” feelings that may intensify over time:
Discouragement – setbacks flip encouragement into doubts, loss of energy, and confidence.
Despondency – disheartened and unable to take action toward desired goals.
Despair – the hopelessness of one desire is projected onto everything and the entire future.
Desperation – last ditch intense, ineffective struggle to achieve desired results.
Depression – a complex mix of the above and perhaps sadness, frustration, anger, resignation, and more.
All of these share degrees of Hopelessness and Helplessness; lots of thinking and imagining dark outcomes that feel just as real as the once hopeful expectations.
Better Outcomes:
What can you do about those hopeless thoughts? Watch them more closely. What false assumptions and beliefs are creating them? When things don’t go as planned, do you blame yourself, take it as evidence of your defects, believe there’s nothing you can do about it, ever? Here’s where surrender can help. Can you give up, not on yourself but on those beliefs? Can you try on some resurrecting thoughts? Try right now saying: Life has its own way; shit happens; we can’t control outcomes, only our intentions and efforts; this is big now but now is not forever – tides and trends always change. This kind of thinking, when it feels true even momentarily, cannot co-exist with fatalistic feelings.
Also, take a look at the goals that are the engine of this train. Were they realistic? Do the results perhaps not indict YOU but rather call for using what you have learned to update and modify the initial ideas of what you’re going to do, when it will all happen, and/or the plan of how it can be done? Any part of the goal and approach can be altered or improved upon, rather than assuming nothing’s ever possible. Did you draw limiting conclusions from the disappointment? Realize that you know more now than you did then!
And, as you work more consciously with your emotions, you can begin to feel the difference between sadness (see the previous email/ blog) and depression. Both deal with change (it happened and you are adjusting vs. it needs to happen and you must figure out what isn’t working) and letting go (of what was vs. of what is and how you’ve done things). Both lead to discovering new ways to move forward, new life ahead.
More Help:
These ideas work, but there is work to do. These and the further ideas and practices in Senses of the Soul have helped a lot of people. Depression work is particularly tricky because it requires the very Will which depression diminishes. Outside support is pretty important here, more so than with some other emotions. In Emotional Liberation, when you take a deep and safe dive into depression, after having worked well with Fear, Desire, Anger, and Grief for a month each, you will tame it and make it your friend. Every year in this 10-month course, I see huge changes and benefits from the steady drip of new information each week by video, the professional coaching from me and the other facilitators, and the weekly group support session. I call it group self-therapy; it brings the benefit of both.
Email me or set up a free 15min conversation with any questions you have about this life-changing program which begins on September 6th. Sign up by August 14th for early commitment incentives of a $200 discount AND an extra coaching session before the program begins to get started with your work. Use code EL200 at checkout for $200 off pay at once price. There is also a payment plan option with unique pricing and includes the early $200 discount. Check out Emotional Liberation here…